the drapes

This is going to be a weird one. But I’m diving in like Trey Songs. We’re talking about Vaginas… Sorry Dad, I have a blog on ambitious topics somewhere that maybe more your thang. I work as a waxologist at a wax bar. So 8 hours a day, I wax vagina. Well I wax everything but primarily coochie. You can only imagine the questions, jokes, and innuendos I get when people find out this sacred piece of information… Let’s just start by saying most importantly A) I promise you. Your vagina is normal. Big flaps, little flaps, no flaps, uneven flaps. Stop worrying. Stop googling labaiplasty or vaginal rejuvenation cause the one thing I’ve learned from seeing so much vag is the thing that makes them all the same is that they are all a little different. Categories? Sure. But for the most part they all look like lady bits to me… and I’ve seen more then any man that’s gonna see yours, dispite what he might tell his buddies.

Next your puib do is totally up to you. Brazilians are super common but I’ve seen squares, triangles, bushes, strips, haven’t been asked about shapes yet but nothing is out of the question… and although I think it’s weird to show your partner you carved your pubic hair into a heart for them. Love is love and do what you want. Same with the vajazzling… Like anyone who knows me know if something is ugly, if you put rhinestones on it I’ll probably like it. Which is true except when it come to vagina. Like how deep in a relationship do you have to be to come home like “Hey, I let a stranger glue individual rhinestones around my clit, let’s fuck so I can pick them off the bed sheets later” I don’t know. Again do you. (Also disclaimer, I’m not saying you should get waxed or vajizzled or a certain shape for a guy, if a sparkly, lighting bolt shaped sweet spot makes you feel sexy, shine on you crazy diamond)

This next bit might be TMI but hey you asked. Let’s talk about assholes. If you don’t do something about this, You have a hairy asshole. If you’re okay with that, all the power to you but if you just don’t think you do cause you never really see it I’m here to tell you you’re wrong and it’s hairy and if you haven’t done anything, It’s probably long. I recommend just getting a professional to take care of this for you. I can see angles you can’t and ask anyone who’s shaved their ass, just let us handle it. Lastly in the asshole section which is probably TMFI but I’m sure it will be appreciated by all waxers and clients alike. If you do come in for a between the cheeks service. That wipe we give you? Front and back ladies…

Next, I don’t wax myself. Mainly for those angle concerns mentioned in the previous paragraph. Not only that. It would be messy and there are important bits and pieces down there I’d like to keep in tact. I get whoever is client free at work to do it. I don’t really care, they don’t really care it’s a sweet kind of co-workmanship.

Also, I don’t do men below the belt. I haven’t been trained in men so I’m not the girl to speak on this topic. I’ve decided I don’t think I have a interest in offering those type of mens services. I’m not super comfortable with it so that alone is reason enough. But from what I know you can do as little or as much as you like. A lot of pulling and tighting of loose skin in involved… They aren’t an extremely popular service, but popular enough we offer them. Take what you will.

TIP YOUR WAXER, as someone who works in beauty and hospitality, it blows my mind sometimes that I get tipped to pour you a glass of wine but not to wax your ladybits. 20% for a bikini service minimum. Get on your waxers good side early and it will benefit you in a lot of ways. Also just a quick tip for you… Whatever service your getting weather it be a french bikini, classic or Brazilian. Please take your panties off. Most of the time I’m not worried if you took them off, I’m more worried that you left them on. Makes it harder for the two of us. Trust.

I hope this doesn’t discourage anyone who’s considered getting a bikini wax. The reason I can joke about it is that it is such a casual topic for me. I do this everyday. I’m not looking to see if your labia is even, I’m hoping your hair is long enough so we can do this. I recommend finding a waxer your comfortable with. Chat to her! I love chatting and creating a raport with my clients. And it’s fair game. We hear it all. I always joke to my clients that “we are best friends now”. If your nervous tell me, if it hurts too much, tell me, if your on your p-rod. Fucking tell me. (Totally cool by the way, it’s just better if we discuss it so it’s not as awks when I have to move your string out of the way) And waxing down there will change your life. Consecutively mind you. You seasonal waxers are making it way harder then it has to be. Try coming 3 months consecutive and then come and thank me for your new dolphin vagina.

nk me for your new soft kitty (no pun intended)…